What's Authentic?

It is so easy to lose track of things isn't it? Your car keys...the time...your wallet? Sometimes it's just a case of "blanking out"...kind of "vegging" on something. Other times it is from being focused on the wrong things. Our last post addressed our tendency to "drift" towards what we focus on...not only when driving...or in life...but in spiritual things as well. So with that in mind...we are often asked, "If authentic relationships are what it is supposed to be about...then what makes a relationship authentic?" Good question. We speak a lot of being genuine...or real...or authentic...but what does that look like in the context of person to person relationship? Especially in light of God's emphasis on living such a life? I think we often lose track because "we" try to define authentic. I have my ideas. You have your ideas. Bob has his ideas. Heather has a completely different take. Sven sees things completely wrong in my opinion. Ned has it partially right...but...not quite. We loose track in these conversations...though the dialogue is good and healthy. We loose track because "we as people" who do relationships poorly, are trying to define what we don't know. Especially in modern culture, with divorce, broken homes, single parents, redefined families, kids raising themselves without parents, etc... Is it any wonder we all have such skewed ideas about what an "authentic relationship" looks like? The answer my friends, (is not blowing in the wind), comes from the One who IS RELATIONSHIP. The easiest and clearest way to understand "authentic relationship" is to look to the One who created us craving authentic relationship. Do you think the One who created us with the need for authentic relationship, might also have a clue on how that need is best met? As we discovered in our previous posting, a genuine relationship with God alone does not satisfy the "aloneness" of the human heart. God knows this...acknowledges it...and made you that way. Why? Because you are a relational being...like God is...and you crave authentic relationship. God who scripture defines as being "love" should be our one and only source to answering this question. Surely a God, who is Love, knows what pure, genuine, unpolluted love should look like. And it is from Him we should learn...and align ourselves towards. Jesus, at the Last Supper, His last time with his closest friends, the apostles, gives them one command, "Love each other, as I have loved you". That should give us a pretty big clue to how much God values this relationship stuff...and also how we might live it out. Jesus is our model. Jesus emphasizes that we are to serve one another...even lay down our life for one another. The bible actually goes so far as to say, "if you do not love others... the love of God is not in you". Wow, that's a big one! So how does our imperfect, messy, human love become more God love like? The bible would suggest that as we experience God's love personally, then His love will flow through us to others. How do you know when God's love is flowing through you and not some polluted attempt at love you learned wrong somewhere? Fortunately, the bible tells us clearly what love is and is not... in chapter 13 of 1st Corinthians, "If I could speak all the languages of earth and of angels, but didn’t love others, I would only be a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal. If I had the gift of prophecy, and if I understood all of God’s secret plans and possessed all knowledge, and if I had such faith that I could move mountains, but didn’t love others, I would be nothing. If I gave everything I have to the poor and even sacrificed my body, I could boast about it; but if I didn’t love others, I would have gained nothing. Love is patient and kind. Love is not jealous or boastful or proud or rude. It does not demand its own way. It is not irritable, and it keeps no record of being wronged. It does not rejoice about injustice but rejoices whenever the truth wins out. Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance." The fact that "doing good stuff"... even "good churchy stuff"...without love is said to be useless, should serve as a healthy caution. God isn't about relationships of performance...but of love...godly love as outlined in this scripture. Deep down we are familiar and even crave this type of love...it is the ideal...the perfect...as it should be! That is why we quote it so often in weddings. It is what we hope to attain to...but often fall short of. But the good news is, we have a good healthy love defined for us in 1 Corinthians and modeled for us in Jesus life as well. It is a good check point for each of us desiring "authentic relationship". These are the things we should align with...pray towards...and ask God's Spirit to teach us. Let's face it...some of us tend to be impatient. Some tend to be selfish. Some tend to be greedy. Some tend to be very unappreciative and negative. Some tend towards being rude and harsh. Some definitely lack self control. But regardless of our imperfect selves trying to be in relationship with imperfect others, God's grace does invite us on a journey towards the authentic. Not what we think it is...but what He designed it to be. The cool thing is Jesus asks us to walk with Him...on a journey of relationship...as we learn relationship. We don't arrive, that is why His grace is so wonderful. But He does say His Spirit, will be our Counselor, our Helper, our Source. Isn't it cool that the God who is Love teaches us how to...and how to be? The result, the scripture says is something called the "fruit of God's Spirit"...it is what grows in us and through us as God's Spirit teaches us His authentic love. Notice how relational all these are. Galatians chapter 5, verses 22 and 23 say, " "But the Holy Spirit produces this kind of fruit in our lives: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control." Isn't that what we all crave? Isn't that what those around us crave also? At ECHO we are so thankful these thoughts in 1 Corinthians 13 and Galatians 5 aim us in the "authentic relationship" direction. Our various opinions, probably not. But God's definition of love, as the God of love, who created us for relationship...you bet...that is as "authentic & genuine" as you can get! May we never lose track of these 2 scriptures as we grow into authentic people who love others genuinely. They reveal so much of God's heart for us...and what love looks like as it flows through us to others. It's an easy start on a journey we'll never finish. Let's embrace that...and grow in it...as we constantly align our soul towards what God welcomes us to...authentic relationship with Him...and others!

be God's!
Brian O
Lead Pastor dude, ECHO